I have a beautiful and wise friend who is so put together. Her folders are perfect, her binders are adorable, her books are never dog-eared and she has a beautiful assortment of pens she uses to underline the pages of her Bible so they don’t bleed through. She even uses a straight edge to make her underlines just about perfect. She knows I’m writing about her on here and that I love her desperately—and that I envy her high taste in reading and writing accessories. And every time I buy a book, I imagine that what I described to you above will also be me this time around. And then, inevitably, the book gets caught in the bottom of my purse or my mailman leaves the book on my porch in a cardboard box as the rain pours down, and it comes in slightly soggy (never to recover, of course!). Or as I’m underlining my Bible (with my new set of pens), an eager five year old comes and bumps me so the line that was intended to be straight, now looks more like a mountain peek.
While this all may sound somewhat comical, I do think it points to a bit of a bigger problem for me. One that points to the discontentment in my heart. I want to be someone I’m not. I am reminded of Genesis 3 and Eve and the serpent. His deception is not out-right. It is subtle—Eve, you can be like God: “Did God really say, ‘You can’t eat from any tree in the garden?’… No! You will not die…In fact, God knows that when you eat it your eyes will be opened and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”
Subtlety. Satan can pile up so many subtle doubts and desires in our hearts that soon we desperately desire to become someone we are not. The lies are real—”Abbey, you’re not good enough. You’re not organized enough. You will never be like your friend…but you SHOULD be.”
And soon we begin to believe them, and our hearts become discontent—always desiring what we do not have and to be who we were not intended to be. I recently lamented to someone that I so often don’t feel the freedom spoken of in the Bible. And he reminded me that for those who have committed their lives to Christ, freedom is a spiritual reality.
FREEDOM IS A SPIRITUAL REALITY!
And I was so struck by his wisdom. Though I may not always feel something, I must guard against the devil’s schemes that I am somehow not free. That I am somehow not good enough for God—even when it comes to my Bible reading accessories! There is freedom in the cross! And I must cling to the Truths of the Bible—not to the lies that so easily creep in and around us on a daily basis.
This very same woman recently shared with me quote in a book by Tim Keller on Judges. He says, “The cross is the place where we find the freedom to accept ourselves without being proud, and to challenge ourselves without be crushed.”
And so as I look at my friend, I am challenged not to look at the worldly things I desire but rather at her heart. She is wise and a woman who fears the Lord. Instead of coveting her stuff or her look, may I challenge myself to be more like her in the ways she honors our Father in heaven. May I guard against the subtle distractions that lead to pride and envy..
Oh, God, give us hearts that are content and help the desires of our hearts to come from You!